by: Bob Magee This past week, on their favorite Monday night wrestling show...on the Monday before SummerSlam... wrestling fans were treated to a show that had a feature segment that saw:

a) A one hour long, ***** WWE cross-brand main event match between Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero designed to show the great wrestling talent the company will feature on SummerSlam...

b) A historic moment, as RAW featured the return of Bruno Sammartino, with the announcement of an hour long retrospective of Sammartino's career as the first item to be featured on the new WWE 24/7 Video On Demand service...

c) A featured slot where 7 adult women found creative ways to smear ice cream, hot fudge, and sprinkles on their bodies...

For those who didn't watch RAW...you probably guessed correctly that the answer was:

c) A featured slot where 7 adult women found creative ways to smear ice cream, hot fudge, and sprinkles on their bodies...

That's right. Women smearing ice cream on their bodies...in a segment that was apparently designed to get fans to buy SummerSlam.

Just by coincidence, I have to wonder if WWE just happened to borrow this lovely idea from Joe Schmo 2, which airs on Spike TV immediately following RAW in the United States. To explain, the Joe Schmo 2 show is a faux reality show with 2 featured participants who think the show is real among a remaining group of actors that take part in a a fake "Bachelor/Bachelorette" type show (who know that the show is not real...and have even used the word "marks" to describe the two). In any event...Joe Schmo 2 saw a character who "let slip" to the two "Schmos" that she had acted in a fetish video called "Porked 'N Beans" (use your imagination).

The ice cream routine with these "Divas" is perfect material if you're into some kind of adult entertainment...or if you're into adult films...or on PPVs available on many cable systems, I suppose...and to each their own. My cable company, Comcast, has that sort available through In Demand and the various premium offering available, too.

All this stuff's OK, that is, if it isn't on a wrestling show that I have to watch....or if on Joe Schmo 2 where the character was SUPPOSED to have acted in a softcore porn film. The "Divas" are supposed to be something more...I think.

I understand that Vince McMahon and anyone from WWE will patiently explain to us that what they feature is "sports entertainment", and not wrestling. But what I saw last Monday night was neither sports, nor was it entertaining....and it damned sure wasn't wrestling.

I'm evidently not the only one who feels this way, as the "go home" edition of Raw prior to SummerSlam did a 3.2 cable rating/5 share, with hours of 3.1/3.2. This was the lowest rating not on a major holiday since November 11 (Veterans Day) 2002, when RAW did a 3.15 rating. The ratings for Smackdown were no better as it did a 2.6/5 share last Thursday, the lowest non-holiday since March 20, 2003, a night when many stations pre-empted Smackdown for coverage on the war in Iraq.

If that drivel which people viewed for free (if you don't count the fact that one pays for cable...usually far too much) wasn't enough...how about what the ice cream segment promoted?

As part of Summer Slam, wrestling fans actually had to pay money to see Sunday night, whether they wanted to or not..."Diva Dodgeball".

That's right...on one of the traditional classic four WWF/E wrestling PPVs...we saw "Diva Dodgeball" with a captivating storyline actually featured on WWE.com that presented the "established RAW Divas [taking] issue with the presence of the $250,000 Diva Search hopefuls". The RAW Divas then "ordered the contestants to participate in a game of Diva Dodgeball at SummerSlam."

Lovely.

Sounds just like something that Bill Watts or Eddie Gilbert would come up to draw money with doesn't it?

Actually, no.

With silliness like this, can WWE be surprised that the RAW ratings for the week prior to SummerSlam featured the lowest non-holiday Neilsen ratings in years?

Explain to me why these women were featured on one of the company's four major PPVs, but Rob Van Dam, Rene Dupree (RVD and Dupree were featured on the match airing on Heat), Le Resistance, Charlie Haas, Rhyno, Tajiri, Jamie Noble, Val Venis, and others on the WWE roster weren't.

Explain to me with a straight face that these women are more deserving of a PPV payoff than full-time wrestlers...

And someone please tell me (who isn't first looking over their shoulder for Vince McMahon, Stephanie McMahon or HHH before answering) that this "Diva Dodgeball" segment should get time that could be given to another match on the show.

PWBTS's Eric Walker pointed out that the last time WWE tried this sort of thing on a major PPV was "The Miller Lite Catfight Girls" segment back at Wrestlemania 19. If memory serves, the crowd dumped all over the "match". If there had been any justice whatever, the crowd at Toronto's Air Canada Centre would have done the very same thing.

Paul Nemer of Wrestleview stated in his live report to PWBTS that the crowd booed the Diva Dodgeball segment, possibly because fans realized it was a taped segment. Some may also have been unhappy that Playboy Playmate and likely winner Carmella DeCesare was a no-show.

Until next time...

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If you have comments/questions, or if you'd like to add the AS I SEE IT column to your website, I can be reached by e-mail at bobmagee1@hotmail.com)